Marriage Monday Book Review: The Five Love Languages

Gary Chapman

Northfield Publishing, 203 pp., $14.99

Recommended. As long as you’re not looking for a marriage theology text, this book offers practical encouragement for loving your spouse sacrificially.


  • Teaches spouses to sacrificially serve one another in the spirit of Phil 2:3-4, “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.” Spouses are encouraged to speak their spouse’s love language, even if it doesn’t come naturally.
  • Gives dozens of practical ways to actively love your spouse.
  • Acknowledges that our self-centeredness gets in the way of our marriage (we tend to love our spouses the way we think love should be expressed toward our spouse).
  • Short chapters make it ideal for a husband-wife book club.


I don’t think Gary Chapman set out to write a theology textbook, and I don’t think anyone would disagree with me there. Therefore, I don’t “unrecommend” this book, despite the following areas in which I wish it would have ventured:

  • Scripture is rarely used in this book; in one place where it is used, it is applied only because the person being counseled is “religious”
  • The self-sacrificial act of speaking someone else’s love language is not connected to the gospel, and therefore we miss the primary motivation for creating a thriving marriage and therefore creating a compelling “gospel re-enactment” (Tim Keller, “Marriage” sermon series).


About davestuartjr
Dave Stuart Jr. is a full-time teacher who writes about becoming better, saner teachers at He is a follower of Jesus Christ, a husband to Crystal, and a father to Hadassah, Laura, and Marlena.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: